The Redbeard storyline in Sherlock: a lesson in memory and healing

sherlock holmes burried childhood trauma

I wanted to chat with you about a really intriguing storyline from the television series “Sherlock.” The episode I’m referring to is the one about Redbeard, where Sherlock replaces a traumatic memory with a more comforting one. This storyline raises some pretty important questions about how we deal with traumatic events in our lives and the potential consequences of burying or replacing those memories.

 

sherlock holmes burried childhood trauma

 

So, in the episode, “His Last Vow,” we learn that Redbeard was actually Sherlock’s childhood best friend who was tragically killed by his own sister, Euros. Sherlock had buried the painful memory of his friend’s death and replaced it with the idea that Redbeard was simply a beloved pet. While this allowed him to protect himself from the trauma and pain of losing his friend, it also meant that he was living in a false reality.

 

Now, the idea of burying or replacing traumatic memories is not new. It’s a natural coping mechanism that many people use to deal with difficult experiences. And in the short term, it can be effective. However, over time, we may forget important details or emotions associated with the event. This can lead to problems down the line.

 

For example, when buried memories suddenly resurface, they can be overwhelming and cause huge distress. Triggers can come in many forms – sights, sounds, smells, or even certain words. And when those triggers bring up memories we haven’t dealt with, it can cause anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues.

 

But it’s important to note that not every buried memory needs to be faced head-on. If the memory isn’t causing any issues, there may be no need to bring it to the surface. However, if it’s causing distress or impacting daily life, it may be time to seek help or learn some new skills.

 

In the case of Sherlock, his buried memory of Redbeard did resurface and caused him significant distress. But he ultimately had to face the truth and come to terms with the trauma he had been hiding from. It wasn’t an easy process, but it was necessary for his growth and healing as a character.

 

It’s important to remember that everyone deals with trauma in their own way, and there is no “right” or “wrong” way to cope. However, being aware of the potential consequences of burying or replacing memories can help us make more informed choices about how we deal with difficult experiences. And if we do find ourselves struggling with a buried memory, there’s no shame in seeking help to work through it.

I can help if you’re ready.

Jay

To Judge or Not Be Judged? – That Is The Question!

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To judge or not be judged? That is the question!

You’re going to get judged by others It’s a fact of life and one that you have to accept.

But you know what…you’re going to judge other people too.

You can’t help it. Even at a subconscious level, you are frequently making small judgements and assumptions about people throughout the day. They don’t have to be mean judgements, or particularly large ones, but every single small detail of a person makes you create a picture that’s filled in with assumptions about that person’s life.

But every single judgement you make is totally inaccurate, because it’s only based on your own experiences, that are probably totally different to the person you’re judging.

So on that idea that your judges of people are nothing more than imaginary, I want to focus on why people are so scared of being judged.

Because after all, if a person’s judgements are only based on their own ideas of the world and don’t mean anything to you, then why are you so scared of being judged by other people?

Acceptance Is The Key To Self Improvement

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Acceptance is the key to self improvement…

Imagine you’re going to take a trip to Los Angeles and you’re planning to set off from Houston.

You get your map ready, plan your route and set off, but it turns out that you were actually in New York the whole time.

How quickly do you think you’re going to get confused and lost?

Your self improvement journey is exactly the same!

If you don’t accept where you are now, then you are never going to be able to properly and accurately plan your road to self improvement and recovery. By not accepting how much help you need, you will most likely end up trying to rush your progress and get completely derailed.

So today, I want to look at the journey to self improvement and why it’s so key to fully and completely accept your current situation and restrictions, so that you can have a fruitful and properly planned road to your mental recovery.

 

You Can Choose To Be Happy? Screw You!

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You can choose to be happy? SCREW YOU!

WHY DON’T YOU CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY?

This is probably a phrase that you have heard time and time again.

I’ve been through bouts of depression and serious anxiety, but whenever I tried to talk about it with anyone, people would often ask why am I living like that. Why aren’t I choosing to be happy?

The question is insulting. If we could choose to be happy, then why would anyone live any other way?

Why would we have depression, sadness, a worldwide mental health epidemic, if being happy was as simple as flipping a switch?

And it’s this subject that I want to touch on today and discover how we can work out a way towards happiness, if it isn’t simply a choice to be made.

Head Into The Storm of Your Emotions

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Head into the storm of your emotions…

It’s natural to want to run from your problems and your fears.

But I’m going to say something that will sound ridiculous. Something very out of the ordinary.

I think that you need to start heading into the storm of your emotions. Next time you have a terrible trauma or response, I don’t want you to avoid it and get through it.

I want you to face it head on and truly engage in the emotions you’re feeling. Because I believe and swear by the Emotional Trigger Method, that this is the only way to begin truly healing from your emotional traumas.

 

Why Positive Affirmations Don’t Work

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note: Emotional Trigger method
is now called the Debox Method

 

Here’s why positive affirmations and mantras don’t work…

Most of us have tried those special mantras and positive affirmations to help us improve our lives.

While so many self-help teachers and books will tell you that positive affirmations are a great way to improve yourself, I have some bad news.

Behavioural research shows that they rarely ever work and the reason is simple. There are often underlying unconscious feelings and traumas that are holding you back, which no positive messaging is going to change.

But it’s not all negative. Positive affirmations DO WORK for a small percentage of people straight away. Listen to the audio for more details. 

 

Get the Debox Method playbook today. 

Wall To Wall Assholes

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It’s wall-to-wall arseholes out there…

One of my favourite writers Stewart Wilde once said: “Thank you lord for sending me wall-to-wall assholes, I’m gonna learn so much about myself”.

This is the basis of today’s episode. I want to discuss the wall-to-wall assholes that you most likely have in your own life, and explore how the things that you hate in others can teach you so much about yourself.

 

Mirror Mirror On The Wall

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Life is a mirror and it’s time to take a good look…

There’s a very popular concept in psychology called the Mirror. It’s the idea that all our thoughts and feelings about the world are simply a mirror of what we think and feel about ourselves.

In this episode, I want to explore your own personal mirror. The reflection that you are projecting onto the world, that is affecting every thought you have.

And today, we’re especially going to look at how your negative feelings towards others might just be a mirror into the things that you dislike about yourself and how you can go about changing them.

How Can I Stop Taking My Baggage Into My New Relationships?

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note: Emotional Trigger method
is now called the Debox Method

 

How can I stop taking my baggage into my new relationships?

Trying not to bring emotional baggage from past relationships into new ones is one of the most common issues that we see when doing our EMT sessions.

Whether it’s a new romantic relationship or a friendship, it can be hard to let the past go and truly learn to trust someone again after being hurt by someone.

But assuming that every new relationship will be the same as your old ones and letting the treacheries of the past cloud your judgment today is the quickest way to get in the way of your potential future happiness.

It’s unfair on your new partner and it’s self-destructive, so let’s take a look at how we can save you from a lifetime of pain, based on past hurts.

 

If you want to learn how to remove the old baggage that could affect your next relationship get the Debox Method Playbook here. 

They Upset Me! (And other excuses you’re giving yourself)

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They upset me! (And other excuses you’re telling yourself)…

Following on from yesterday’s episode, I want to talk about how shifting the blame when you get upset can help you deal with the negative people in your life.

“They Upset Me”. It’s something I hear all the time, especially from my own kids, but it’s a phrase that is so quick to blame the other party and put them at fault.

Now I want you to think of it, not as they upset YOU, but that “YOU were upset by something that they said”. Do you see the difference. One is someone else’s fault, and in the second example, you take responsibility for your own emotional reaction.

And taking responsibility for your own reactions can do wonders in giving you a thicker skin and helping you move past the insults of others, to become truly self improved and independent.